Response

Love is Crazy

 

What exactly does the word “love” mean? Is love a choice or a feeling that a person has toward another individual? Is love eternal or does it eventually fade away? Does a person have to perform action in order to receive love? Love seems as though it’s a complicated concept that very few people actually know how to define. Therefore, what exactly defines the word “love”?

                Growing up in a Christian home, I was taught that love was based on the Bible. The Christian definition of love could be found in I Corinthians 13 where it describes love as patient, kind, not easily angered, and much more. According to many Christians, this is a very difficult verse to live up to because not all of us are perfectly loving toward each other. However, they try their best to live up to these standards of love. I personally believe that God is love according to I John 4:8. Christians believe that God’s love is unconditional because throughout history, he constantly displayed his love towards his people in the Bible. Therefore, as a Christian, I was taught that I should follow Christ’s example of love.

                What about those who don’t practice a religion? What does love mean to them? Based on what I have noticed in today’s culture, love is shown quite often through relationships. Many movies and television shows base their stories around a man and a woman who meet in an unexpected way, express interest in each other, face trials that make them separate, then fall in love. Does today’s culture believe that love is based on relationships and what each person can get out of that other significant person? Is love defined by getting what you want out of a person to make you feel good about yourself? I know from experience that basing a relationship around physicality isn’t the ideal relationship because the ending result is emptiness and insecurity. Many of my best friends are in relationships where they are perfectly happy with making boundaries concerning their physicality with one another. In fact, they are the couples who have been dating for years now, yet they still love each other because their love is based on communication and getting to know each other.

                Could love be like a song? Writing songs about love seems to be the topic that artists tend to lean towards because they know it’s what their listeners like to hear. Country songs like “Love Like Crazy” and “Hard to Love” by Lee Brice are written about his love for another person. Brice explains in the lyrics how to keep a lasting relationship by “being her best friend” and “overusing ‘I love you.’” Through another song, he explains how he’s “hard to love,” but he’s thankful that this other person loves him even though he doesn’t deserve it. Why should this person love him when he doesn’t deserve it? This person loves him for who he is and accepts him, flaws and all.

                What does love in a family setting look like? Do families show love more often when they have more children? Do they show it less when they have less children? I have had many years of experience in the field of babysitting, therefore, I have been around many families with different perspectives and ways they display their love. A family with two full-time working parents have two girls in elementary school. The parents make quite a bit of money, but they are rarely home. The girls are loved, but the parents show their love through money. They are constantly buying clothes, new toys, and even giving money to their girls. The girls are both very happy despite the fact that they only see their parents on weekends and a few hours before they go to bed each night.

                On the other hand, another family, a full-time working mom and dad with two elementary school girls and a three year old boy, make quite a bit of money as well, but would do anything to be home with their kids to spend time with them. The mom and dad are constantly telling their kids they love them, and not only do they say it, but they show it through their actions as well. Their children mean the world to them, and rather than constantly worrying about work, their kids are their number one priority. The kids definitely don’t go without, but they feel loved when their mom and dad spend quality time with them, such as riding bikes, playing outside in the rain, or even reading books together.

                Does a person choose to love someone or does it come naturally? According to one of my friends, he said that he’s just not a “naturally loving person.” What does he mean by this? He explained that he has to work hard in order to truly show his love to someone because it’s just not natural for him. By working on correcting his attitude, editing his word choice, and thinking of some actions on how to love a person, he is now able to effectively display his love towards the people he loves and cares about the most. He said it takes time, but the hard work definitely pays off.

                What about friendship love? How do best friends show their love toward each other? How is it different from loving a family member or a significant other? My friends and I always tell each other “I love you.” We write it on each other’s Facebook walls, text it to each other, post pictures on Instagram telling everyone how much we love our best friends, and much more. But what does that phrase really mean? I have some of friends who say “I love you,” but I’m not as close with them, so how do I respond? I normally respond by saying it back to them, but is it really meaningful? I never did anything for them, and they never did anything for me. We just so happened to fall into a deep conversation one day and that’s how we connect with each other. Unlike my best friends, I don’t hang out with these other friends that often. My best friends and I have been through everything together and we tell each other everything. We go out of our way to help each other and never expect anything from the other person because we are so close and have a special connection. So what makes this love different from the love I have towards my other friends I’m not as close to?

                Ultimately, how is love defined? Is it the heart melting Hallmark movies about two people who fall in love with each other and live happily ever after? Is it the childhood fairytales about the princesses who are good to all society and eventually meet their prince charming? Is love conditional with a list of rules or is it unconditional? What is your opinion on love?